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I have so many reasons to be happy. I have a beautiful wife, I have a beautiful daughter, I have a great house, I am able to pay all the bills... yet I still feel depressed. I still have so many issues inside me that bring me down. I feel like I am not giving my family all of me, and I am not able to give them all they deserve. I want to be a better husband and better father and better son and a better brother... but I feel like I am failing miserably. I want my parents to be proud of me and what I have done with my life, I want my wife to think I am a good husband, and father... and I feel like I am failing her because I am not all there. I feel like working on all my issues is getting more attention than working on making our marriage and our relationship better. I want to give my all into my family, yet I have so many stupid issues that are preventing me from doing that. Usually failing is not an option for me... but lately it seems like I am failing so miserably that I dont know what to do. What am I doing with my life... why do I deserve to be here if I cant even live my life to the fullest. People tell me to be strong... tell me to just get past all this... but you know what...it has been years... and it hasnt really got any better... and its hard to believe that it will get any better. Its not as easy as just thinking positive and getting over things... its just not that easy.